I firmly believe that God answers prayers through people. Last fall when my faith was in a slump, I was not real happy about being at 9 am church. But that is when Ed and Sara walked in the chapel doors. I knew they had both returned home late from SUU's football game, and there they were... on time and smiling. You see Ed isn't even a member of the church, but Sara is. I shouldn't have been surprised- Ed never misses a Sunday. I love that Ed supports Sara in her faith. I love how they love each other. I love that even though they both have "honest questions" they still have faith.
A Young returned missionary taught me a simple and profound question last week in church. Elder Gavin Jones just recently returned from the Lima Peru Mission relayed this experience. He told of a little girl who came to him and said she wasn't sure she had faith. He replied, "Do you want to have faith?" She said simply, "yes." He in turn said, "then you have faith." It is that easy....
I want to have faith, don't you? We all have questions about certain gospel doctrine such as the priesthood, polygamy, the Book of Abraham, etc. But you know what, I want to have faith so I am going to have faith. I am going to have faith that all of those questions aren't going to shake my belief that Joseph Smith is a prophet of God, that the Holy Ghost is my constant companion when I obey, that Jesus Christ lived and died for each of us, and that Families are Forever.
You see, I have to much at stake to lose my way now... our "fab five" need Rigby and me to be strong. They need to see us serve, read the Book of Mormon, visit and home teach, and pray with them.
Elder Jeffrey R. Holland's talk "Lessons Learned from Liberty Jail" literally carried me through an entire decade-- the decade of he... the decade where Travis commuted for a year for work, where we lost two babies, where we had our fifth child during his commuting period, where Travis had his stroke, where Travis struggled to overcome the effects of his stroke (5 plus years), where I was met head on with the fact that I was a childhood victim of abuse, where I had a near heart attack followed by heart surgery, where the lady at church was not nice to us at ALL, where Trav served in the bishopbric, where Travis served as scoutmaster, where I was the PTA President, where I really didn't like my bishop, where our cute adorable boys became teenagers- you know, you have all had decades like that. but you know what Elder Holland taught me.... that sometimes you just have to be Belle! And that it is through the experiences of trial and turmoil that literally these same experiences become as a "temple" and "purify" us. I can never thank Elder Holland enough.
It was Elder Neil L. Anderson who taught me about my own faith. In October 2015 he addressed members of the Church of Jesus Christ in his talk, "Faith is Not by Chance, but By Choice." It is to this talk I have turned as I have faced questions in regards to my faith in the past six months... questions I could never have dreamed I might have. But Elder Anderson, he knew... because he listed to the promptings of the Holy Ghost. God told him that little Amy Rigby and many others had questions... answer them. Elder Anderson answered them. He told me I was no longer on neutral ground that it was okay to ask honest questions. He also warned me that to get an answer to a spiritual question I needed to head in a spiritual direction and that it would require work. He also told me to "give young Joseph a break." So I did! thank you Elder Anderson for being in tune... thank you for helping me remember my faith. I choose it, and I love it!
So that's where I will be this weekend eating pancakes with the prophets...
XO
Barnwood and Tulips
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